throwback

I'm on the highway back and it feels like the perfect time to write. I know I haven't done so for awhile, but I just have too much emotions to be able to write them all down. But I know deep down that no words would make up for the memories and experiences I've encountered on my trip. On the freeway accompanied by only headlights and surrounded by forests everywhere, it kinda feels like I finally have a gleam of hope somewhere amongst the darkness. I'm gonna miss this place so much or perhaps wherever I am it would be the same. The place never seemed to matter, just having an escape from reality. I don't miss home because idk where home is, I'm still finding for my heart within all the unknown. But the unknown is great, not knowing what comes next or where I'll be tomorrow. Just being able to completely breathe in the air right now and experience this moment. But I guess with everything in life, letting go becomes a huge part of it inevitably. We let go of people we meet and places we go to make way for something new. And I think I have figured out how to finally do that. How to embrace every single moment as something that was meant to happen, something with all the reasons I may not fully understand now but I will in the future. It has always been a constant motion of letting go of everything and I hate to have to do that. But only then do we learn that there is always something else out there, something else to experience and new memories to make. I can't say I found myself, it takes more than half a month to be able to do that, but perhaps I've let in a lot of positivity into my life, and I see things differently. I have learnt to appreciate the simplest of things and to realise that I don't need the comfort of familiarity to find my happiness. I don't need drugs to escape reality and perhaps I don't even need to run away from anything. Everything catches up sooner or later and travelling has allowed me to face unfamiliar boundaries and appreciate the families ones. I miss my family and maybe that's about it, I don't think I will ever crave for a place I could always call home and waking up to a routine based life. I don't think I will ever want to stop exploring places I've never been and taking risks I've never taken. It could be too soon to say, but perhaps this is my purpose in life. I don't think I was ever meant to stay in one place.